Well, low earth orbit… Sort of…
Nice little urner: youngster scatters gran’s ashes in space
Blackheath Granny Shoots Into Space
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The Blackheath Bugle 
I thought it looked like a good idea until I saw he wants FIVE GRAND for it! I suspect my mortal remains will be staying firmly earthbound.
On the subject of old people…how’s the lift at Blackheath Station doing (WC-wise)?
Poor Pat Sinclare.
Would you fancy being dumped in a junk yard when you die?
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-14757926
Mr Chives: On the subject of the station lift, it seemed fine yesterday evening, working normally with not a sign of vandalism or inappropriate use. Someone obviously forgot to tell the rioters it was there.
That’s the good news. The bad is that efforts to get the side gate reopened seem to have come to a complete stop. Is this campaign still active?
pffft… dunno… I haven’t had any reply from SouthEastern. I guess I should go and remonstrate with the blokes in the ticket office, but I haven’t summoned up the courage yet… But if anyone else wants to give it a go?
If the lift is put out of use through inappropriate use – will these help get the side gate open?
ps: have drunk seven pints of adnams