Monthly Archives: January 2011

SouthEastern stats to be scrutinised

University to look at Southeastern punctuality figures

Spotted by Joshua – hopefully it will be truly independent.

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Now Wash Your Hands

Andrex advert using Blackheath village

Eagle-eyed William spotted Blackheath in the hideous Andrex Puppy advert. Look about 30 seconds in. Then read this wonderful review of such a creepy looking promo. As the nutters on youtube say

“Because some people prefer the old real puppy that was actually cute, not a CGI dog wearing a wrist watch”

The Cactus Pit becomes “Bones 4u”. Arf arf.
The Village Barbers maintains the colour scheme, but becomes “Mutts Cuts”. Which would annoy me if I was the owner! It’s a great barber shop!
El Pirata becomes the “Chihuahua Bar”.

(And the song is called “Little Things”, by Dave Berry from 1965)

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The high street becomes even more of a dog’s breakfast

Blackheath Village Roadworks - letter from Lewisham Council
You’ll see how wonderful that headline is when the next post appears. Trust me…

The letter shown above appeared today. It seems that the council are going to make the road over the bridge a bit smoother, and reduce the puddles. Personally, I’d rather keep my bloody library! If the planned sit-in on February 19th doesn’t work, maybe a mass-book removal might.

Here’s the text in full:

Re: Blackhealh Village Road Works
As part of our commitment to maintain the local environment, we will be carrying out road works in Blackheath Village, outside the railway station. The works are being carried out to reduce the height of the existing raised table crossing and to improve the surface water drainage system as much as possible.

We plan to commence the works on Monday 31st of January. Works will take approximately five days, weather permitting, and will be carried out between the hours of 8.00 am and 4.00pm. Unfortunately it will be necessary to carry out some of the works at night, between 8:00pm & 1:00am, although no mechanical breaking will be carried out after 11pm. The night work is expected to be carried out on the first and last nights, although this may be subject to change,

During the works. the pedestrian crossing in front of the station building will be closed. The carriageway width will be reduced and alternate traffic flow will be controlled by temporary signals.

Heavy plant and machinery will inevitably cause some noise nuisance but we will minimise this wherever possible. Your full co-operation with the contractors would be much appreciated.

Lewisham Council thanks you for your patience during these works and we apologise in advance for any inconvenience caused. For any further information or concerns please contact myself directly on 020 8314 2588.
Mike Payami
Senior Engineer/Project Manager

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Filed under blackheath, books, politics

Spamtastic Alex Neil

Alex Neil estate agents, well known for having the most spammy internet marketing, have really out-done themselves with this one: Don’t click, it only encourages them…

I’m not sure that the mechanical turker who wrote this has ever actually been to Blackheath:

Blackheath has always acquired an atmosphere of mystery.

To Alex Neil Estate Agents, unquestionably…

Since virtually any Estate Agent SE3 would know, for countless years the region purported as the ultimate resting place connected with many of those that perished in the Black Death plague. Re

Not sure what the “Re” stands for… Oh, and, even if a region could purport, no they didn’t.

The SE3 post code area possesses unique variations of property or home available for investors.

Note that the variations themselves are unique, not the properties or homes.

By far the most famous and then the most in demand is generally the large Victorian family homes. These kinds of homes, normally set in a good size gardens, appear to sum up this suburb perfectly. Victorian residences generally have larger rooms than the modern-day within the very same price range, with higher ceilings and also fine original characteristics, they’re experienced as a house for a lifetime rather than quick investment property.

House for a lifetime. Not chopped up into little flats… Oh no, that never happens.

Almost all the village’s properties, be they new-build or even Victorian, benefit from their closeness to possibly the areas most well-known asset – the actual heath itself. Placed in the centre of the village, this heath gives residents an open green space that other regions would battle to match up.

The heath isn’t at the centre of the village. It’s north of the village. But you’re only an estate agent trying to sell houses here, why should you be expected to know a thing like that?

In times gone by when free, general public space appeared to be unusual, Blackheath must have been a magnet for all those wanting to get away from the cramped East End conditions.

Yes, in times gone by London was well known for its urban sprawl. These days the city is a rural idyll…

Nowadays, it’s great for the pram and also buggy brigade that’s migrated within the location recently.

The brigade have migrated within Blackheath?

Blackheath Estate Agents are familiar with the reputation their vicinity has with regard to these kinds of lavish houses and also grander open public spots. Recently, property developers have was able to persuade council planning officials on the requirement for much less lavish property.

I think that last non-sentence has was actually made is making my eyes bleeding.

Subsequently a number of the old Georgian and Victorian buildings are already separated into flats.

But earlier you said that they weren’t chopped into flats… And you changed tenses mid-sentence…

This, along with a amount of recently constructed apartment blocks, has diversified the actual area’s property offering.

A amount of my soul just died whilst watching the way that you use apostrophe’s.

As you would expect, this has prompted an extremely distinct inflow into the vicinity when compared to the family house market place.

As the inflow inflowed into the vicinity, he could not hesitate to be amazed by its very distinctiveness…

Quite a few young professionals see here as an affordable alternative to pricey Greenwich.

Er, no. Quite a few young professionals are crapping themselves about how they’ll ever afford to buy a shoe-box anywhere in Blackheath or Greenwich.

Blackheath is always certainly one of London’s most-loved villages.

Go on, I’ll give you that one.

Reachable from most of the main motorways coming down the East of England and into Kent, and close to the centre of London by several transport means, it gives a terrific property investment opportunity. Be it family home or maybe Pied a Terre, this vicinity will certainly suit your changing property or home and lifestyle needs throughout the years.

Blah blah

Alex Neil Estate Agents are one of the largest and most successful independent Agencies in South East London. Be sure to see how we can help you Buy a property in SE3 Estate Agent SE3

Alex Neil spam SE3 SE3 spam spam spam, Britney Spears, Houses, Flats, Barf, Distinctive Inflow, I thought the internet was actually for words, etc, etc…

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Bus Lane Camera – £1m fines this year?


Good article in the Evening Standard about the bus lane camera of doom. I’ve had loads of emails about this from various unhappy people. It seems like a hell of a tax. I can’t actually find the camera in question on Streetview, but might take a wander later to pinpoint it. If anyone spots it, please add a comment below.

I seem to remember someone telling me that in South Africa people often shoot at speed cameras. (I’m not suggesting that as a course of action!)

Bus lane camera that is set to take £1m in fines from drivers this year

In just over three months since going live, the Blackheath camera generated Lewisham 3,742 tickets — more than £220,000 in fines….

It means it is on course to earn at least £900,000 if the tickets are paid promptly, securing a 50 per cent discount, but more likely to be well over £1 million….

…A leading criminal barrister is contesting a £60 ticket he was issued. Rupert Bowers, who has defended multi-million-pound fraud cases brought by HM Revenue and Customs, is now turning his attention to Lewisham.

UDPATE:
In the comments, Kate points out:

The camera is on the wall of Felicity Thingy estate agents, above the late lamented chocolate shop, very high but pointing straight up the road. It’s not painted yellow or anything useful.

Added a Google Streetview image above.

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Breathing in Blackheath

Air monitoring unit in Google Streetview
There’s a great project, started last year by Andy Broomfield, called Breathing London. It takes the data from air quality monitoring stations across London, and tweets their changes in human readable language, like this:

It frequently pops up on my radar, as there is a monitoring station on the border of Blackheath & Greenwich.

You can see graphs of the air quality across London as a whole on the London Air Quality Network site, but it is also possible to drill-down to specific monitoring stations, and look at the air pollution for the last week, or last month.

Here’s the data for the station in Blackheath. The actual location of the station is here (see the photo above from Google Streetview).

You can follow BreathingLondon on Twitter, and there’s a detailed explanation of how the air pollution monitoring works here.

The summary for Blackheath says that last year the area was within government targets for air quality, except for Nitrogen Dioxide, which was at 60 microgrammes (µg) per cubic metre. According to the London Air Quality Network site:

At very high levels, nitrogen dioxide gas irritates and inflames the airways of the lungs. This irritation causes a worsening of symptoms of those with lung or respiratory diseases.

From the City of London Air Quality Strategy 2011-2015 pdf:

At present there are two health based objectives that have been set for nitrogen dioxide. The first is to make sure hourly concentrations do not go above 200µg/m3, for more than 18 hours in any year. The second objective is to ensure that the annual average is no greater than 40µg/ m3.

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Filed under blackheath, green

Christmas Tree-age


I’ll definitely stop the terrible headline puns soon, I promise. It seems that Greenwich council will pick up your old tree with their usual green bin collections. Lewisham council on the other hand want you to go to one of these locations to drop off your tree. I’ve no idea where you put the tree when you get there:

* Hilly Fields – Hilly Fields Crescent entrance, SE4
* Deptford Park – Scawen Road entrance, SE8
* Telegraph Hill – Pepys Road/Kitto Road entrance, SE14
* Talbot Place – Blackheath, SE3
* Mountsfield Park – entrance top of George Lane, SE13
* Sydenham Wells Park – Wells Park Road entrance, SE26
* Forster Memorial Park – entrance top of Whitefoot Lane, SE6
* Northbrook Park – Baring Road entrance, SE12
* Mayow Park – Mayow Road entrance, SE23
* Chinbrook Meadows – Amblecote Road, SE12
* Manor House Gardens – Old Road entrance, SE13
* Beckenham Place Park – Old Bromley Road entrance, BR3

Again, two wildly different approaches from the two adjacent councils. Lucky Greenwich people…

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