Category Archives: snow

snow

Snowy Blackheath


It’s extremely snowy in Blackheath! But something is very wrong. All the trains appear to be running on time, and there is grit on several pavement corners. I have no idea why or how this has happened, but this oversight should not go unpunished.

Every year I dream of building a massive network of igloos across the heath, strung together with little ice tunnels. It never happens, but last year I managed to build an igloo (not in Blackeath). It’s not as hard as it looks, so long as you have lots of help, and some big plastic crates from a Pound Shop to compact the snow bricks. Try it and let me know where your Blackheath Igloo is!

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Winter on planet Blackheath

Winter on planet Blackheath by Flickr user Crispin Cresswell
Here’s an awesome one – Winter on planet Blackheath by Flickr user Crispin Cresswell. An enormous dirty snowball of Blackheath, hurtling through a wintry sky!
(Image used by kind permission).

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Snowy Blackheath

It snowed. In case you haven’t looked out of the window. God knows how we’ll cope tomorrow, what with SouthEastern and everything. I really want to build a network of igloos on the heath, so here’s hoping there’s more snow… If you’ve got any nice pics of Blackheath, send them this way! Happy snowdays!
Here’s one from Philtocapacity on twitter:
Philtocapacity snowy blackheath

And from David Boyle, an antisocial snowball:
Antisocial snowball by David Boyle

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The Great Train Robbery

The Great Train Robbery
Could snow failure could end Southeastern’s franchise early? We can only hope so.

Awesome poster is by @set_railfail. I imagine the author would be delighted if you printed it out, and stuck it somewhere…

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It must be snowing…

It’s that time of year – time for the up-the-nostril shots from your favourite London News programme… Here’s a clip (the proper version will appear here eventually).

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Igloo on the Heath

Igloo on Blackheath
Gossip overheard by Mrs Bugle on the bus (attempting to get to work).

Two 15 year old girls:

“There’s a big igloo on the heath, they were up til 2am building it!”

Spotted by Simon Berriman on Twitter.

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SouthEastern Trains make their sorry excuses

SouthEastern Train Revised Timetable at Lewisham Station during the snow

As pointed out by @AdamBienkov, SouthEastern have provided an explanation of why they ran such a poor service during the inch or so of snow that fell last month in the South East.  I’ve tried to convert it into text, but the hopelessly blurry, badly scanned PDF file provided at the london.gov website made it even less comprehensible.

Here’s a quick summary, if you haven’t got time to read the real thing:

Why did you run a revised timetable, finished at 8.30pm throughout the piddling quantity of snow that fell?

We realised that we’d have to pay lots of money out to our customers for our lousy service, unless we under-promised and over delivered, so rather than try to put on as many trains as possible, we figured out that we could stick up some dirty A4 sheets of laser-printed Times Roman warnings, and this would allow us to wriggle out of our obligations – like this one!

Why won’t you be offering refunds to season ticket holders?

Because they’re a bunch of mugs!  Why on earth should we?!  They pay £1000 a year, and we don’t even have to give them a seat on our cattle trucks!*  Are you high?  If we started giving them their money back, we wouldn’t be able to make £61.5 million in profits!

Now that we live in the age of the internet, maybe you could make it easier for your customers to request compensation?

Yeeeassss… That’s a greeeat idea… Maybe we’ll make a little iPhone app for each of our customers?  And you can click on Charles Horton’s beaming face every time you get squeezed into a carriage, and sit waiting at London Bridge for 20 minutes on  a Monday morning?  That’d work.  If it’s all the same with you, we’ll stick with arcane system we have right now, thanks.

See also:

All aboard the Gravy Train for Network Rail Bosses

* Cattle trucks = “franchises focused on high density, urban commuter markets.”

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